I’m feeling a bit flat! – but for all the right reasons. Actually can there be any right reasons for feeling ‘a bit flat’?
You see, last week my son got married. For almost six years Oliver has dated his perfect match – the love of his life. Beautiful Bea is everything I could have ever wished for my son – she keeps him grounded when he’s up in the air, and yet she flies with him when he needs a companion for his madcap aspirations. She’s beautiful, gentle, strident, kind, generous, warm hearted… everything in equal measure. Everything he needs and deserves. And everything we ever dreamed of in a daughter in law.
After almost a year of planning, and the final few months of being actively engaged in wedding preparations, the big day finally arrived. And what a day! The weather was on our side with glorious sunshine all day, the ceremony was stunning (if not just a little emotional), and the reception sumptuous. It was just so special to see all our family and friends gathered in one place to celebrate this lovely couple. Smiles and tears all round.
But now, here I am – no longer needed for the moment. No urgent phone calls to check this, amend that, or accompany Bea on her final dress fitting… And this pause has given me time to reflect.
I reflect on all the different stages of Oliver’s life. So many transitions, so many momentous occasions, from his first day on planet earth; realising he could whistle at just a year old; his first day at nursery; countless school plays at primary and then grammar school – including the Rocky Horror Show, in stockings and suspenders (!!?), and the Full Monty – well you know how that ends… Then before I knew it he was off to university, followed by drivers licence, first job, career, first home, and even his own dog.
Now as his mother, I’m pausing to take in the experience of all my jumbled emotions. The joy of seeing him living his best life with the love of his life; but also (slightly selfishly) the emptiness of knowing that he doesn’t need me quite as much as he used to.
So forgive me for feeling ‘flat’ – I think it must just be a mother thing. It will pass, and I’m sure it won’t be too long before the phone rings and I’m needed again.
A final thought for all you busy parents out there, dashing around on school runs, swimming lessons, uni drop-offs, or whatever - take a minute to appreciate every precious moment
(Main image on the post courtesy of Origin Studios. Grateful thanks to Ian Boichat)
